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The Backyard Ramble - Parade Day Edition

March 12, 2014

In some cities, every day is a party...Las Vegas, for instance, is the world's foremost destination for performing unspeakable acts you would prefer to hide from your family and friends, New Orleans is a drunken dickshow every night of the year, and State College is the real-world equivalent of Neil Young's Sugar Mountain. While Scranton is not one of those cities (Our lack of legalized brothels, drive-thru liquor stores, and citizens between the ages of 18 & 24 makes a difference in that respect), we do set aside one day each year that we dedicate solely to the pursuit of an elusive, ephemeral, and ultimately subjective experience that mankind has been chasing ever since we found the black monolith that taught us how to use tools to murder each other: a good time.


And, Parade Day is our day to have a good time. It falls on the Saturday before St. Patrick's Day  each year (unless St. Patrick's Day falls on a Saturday or Sunday itself, in which case the Parade is held the previous Saturday), and it gives Scrantonians the rare opportunity to get drunk together and celebrate our shared love of innebriation.  In a city where a majority of the population has a little Irish in them (or has had a little Irish in them at some point, ladies), we all rally together to celebrate our shared heritage, painting the town green in the hopes that each of us will get lucky in some way. That being said (and this being a Backyard Ramble), what beer pairs well with Parade Day? 


While the entire point of Parade Day is to consume mass quantities of alcohol while wearing green, if one hopes to survive past the early afternoon into the dark depths of the evening hours, a strategy must be employed, or all shall surely be lost. The ideal beer for such a day should feature a good deal of flavor, a relatively low ABV, and some sort of connection to the Emerald Isle. Luckily, Guinness fulfills all of those requirements: brewed in Dublin, Ireland, since 1759, Guinness is a dry Irish stout that clocks in at a respectable 4.2% ABV. Its roasted malt notes and creamy mouth feel make it a pleasure to drink, and the cascading effect produced by its nitrogen bubbles makes it pleasing to the eye as well. Guinness will get you where you need to be, but it will also keep you from going over the edge. 


What else can I say about Parade Day? It's our grandest day, the one day of the year when we throw ourselves a blowout and hope for the best, when we come together to celebrate our past, present, and future in the hopes that we can look past our differences and laugh together for a bit, and, usually, it ends up turning out alright. Maybe we should do this sort of thing more often...


See you on the flip side.










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